Yesterday, in case you were living under a rock and didn't see, a monumental vote took place to try to pass Initiative 26 in Mississippi. The intended purpose was to ban abortion, but the bill had a lot of other implications like the potential to ban birth control, IVF, and even bring cases against doctors who aborted an ectopic pregnancy or women who had miscarriages. None of these were guarantees. Not even outlawing abortion was a guarantee. The bill only served to define a person, it said nothing about abortion, nothing about birth control, nothing about IVF. The results of the bill could only be speculated on.
That wasn't good enough for a lot of people, obviously, and the bill did not pass.
That wasn't good enough for a lot of people, obviously, and the bill did not pass.
I have a proposition: instead of devoting all this energy to a bill like this, and until we can all agree on a proper bill with proper wording, let's redirect our energy to ramp up the efforts that do exist in our country, albeit on too small a level, to support women. Let's open more pregnancy crisis centers. Let's offer more support to each other. Let's offer less hateful words to mothers considering abortion and more love (after all, as Christians, we should be striving to do this every single day to every single person - more love, less harsh words). Let's offer to support more children in foster homes. Let's work on changing the adoption system in this country so that so many children don't end up in foster care. Because one thing I can guarantee is that if abortion is ever outlawed, there will be a flood of unwanted babies. That's not an if. We love to talk about the idealistic banning of abortion, but we don't follow through with propositions to handle the problems that will create.
Will we just ban abortion and then move on with our lives, refusing to do anything to then help the babies who end up in dumpsters or in terrible, dangerous homes or born addicted to crack? I'm all about an abortion ban, but if we want to get serious about it, then we must get serious about the results.
I hear women say that unwanted babies shouldn't ever mean we allow abortion. Again, idealistic. I can agree with the logic, but not the refusal to propose we do anything. Idealistic women say to me that it doesn't matter if babies are born into unloving homes because that's always better than not being born at all. Idealistic women say to me that there are tons of families who want to adopt. While I agree with ALL of that logic, it's not the reality and it's time we be brutally honest about that.
I 100% agree with everything you just said. Once a huge pro-choicer I have since turned a corner and am now usually more pro-life, but that doesn't mean that I want to see birth control, IVF, and abortion options come to an end. I just wish that in cases of unwanted pregnancies that adoption was considered more. Being a mom now, I'm constantly having a battle with myself trying to figure out where I stand on things...but Initiative 26 was not something I ever considered supporting because it was too vague.
ReplyDeletegood thoughts Chelsea. i completely agree!
ReplyDeleteit's a hard issue with women who are considering AB, to ask them to consider adoption. without fail, the response is almost always, if i do that, i might as well keep the baby, because i couldn't give it away. we present adoption as an option, and give them referrals if they're interested. most of the time in AB the biggest factors are relieving the stress that they are currently facing- finances, work or lack of work, school, parents, pressure from FOB, food, clothes, shelter. Once those fears are dealt with it makes the decision to carry that much easier to handle with the right support and community resources. that's at least what i've seen as a CPC peer counselor.
First of all...I think you make some amazing points here! It's refreshing to see a person not afraid of speaking the reality of the situation we're in.
ReplyDeleteSecond...5 years ago I was facing an "unwanted" pregnancy. I had no insurance, no support from my family who was very upset with me for getting pregnant outside of marriage, I was in a relationship with the father (now my husband!) but we were broke college students. The whole situation was scary and daunting and we honestly had no idea how we'd make it. Although I was a Christian I seriously considered abortion. I couldn't see how it would all work out. As you said above, there just weren't enough systems in place to help me see how being a potentially single mother would be worth it AT ALL. And it's not like I hated the baby inside of me, I loved it and I wanted a good life for it...a life I felt we couldn't give it.
Long story short...I went to Planned Parenthood & would you believe the woman told me I didn't need to have an abortion? She said there were ways to make it, I just needed support, & she helped me sign up for Medicaid on the spot. The next day I went to a pregnancy care center where I could take parenting classes and meet other women in my situation. I was also able to receive counseling which helped me reconcile with my family. I had my baby and today we are married with a soon to be 5 yr old boy and an 18 month old too! :-)
I share all of this to make this point...for women with no insurance, no support from family/friend/boyfriends/husbands/whoever, no job, no access to an affordable daycare so they can work, etc., etc., etc., the thought of a baby seems impossible. And can you blame them? We need to make it so those women don't fear the thought of a child. I personally don't think the pro-life movement has done enough in that regard. Pregnancy care centers are wonderful things, but it's not always enough to make women feel secure. Policies need to change...social "welfare" systems can't be cut. That's how I feel anyway.
OK...I'm blabbing now and I don't know if I've made sense, but thanks for all the food for thought! :-)
Thanks for pointing out that Planned Parenthood isn't all about pushing abortions. I understand that a lot of people have a hatred for them, but I have heard of many cases, like yours, where they encouraged moms NOT to abort their babies. And thanks for sharing your story! It's VERY encouraging. :)
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